You’ve found yourself hooking up with a handsome man or beautiful woman, and you initially intend to keep things casual and commitment-free. Then you start to really like each other and date, and you continue to spend more time together. At a certain point, you wonder, “Are we just hanging out, or is this turning into something more serious?” The question is always on your mind.
A summer getaway can get unexpectedly complicated. The exciting thing about a summer fling can be the questions and possibilities about what exactly is going on between you and how you feel about that person. You may have said that neither of you are looking for a serious relationship. Maybe you don’t even live in the same city because you met on vacation, so it doesn’t seem possible for you to start a real relationship.
Even though you may have been casual about this “thing” between you, in the back of your mind you keep asking yourself if you’re a couple. Even though summer has just begun, you feel sad when you think you’ll never see this person again. Deep down, you hope this is more than just a passing romance. Because you haven’t made any commitments, you may be seriously confused by both your own feelings and the other person’s behavior.
The last thing you want to do is wonder, “What happens when summer is over?” Raising such an uncomfortable question as. After all, you both agreed that this was just a fling. But at the same time, you don’t want to let the ‘perfect for you’ partner just get away. What if he actually wants more too?
To figure out if there’s more to this summer love, pay attention to these five important signs:
1. You feel comfortable together
Every relationship is different. No sign promises certainty about the beginning of a long-term relationship. However, if you feel comfortable around that person, it may mean that a longer-term relationship is ahead of you. Does it feel right to go out together? Do you feel like you can be yourself and “let things go” when you’re together? When you’re just getting to know someone, there’s usually a bit of awkwardness between you. However, at some stage this awkwardness stops and you realize that you are completely comfortable around each other.
2. You really like and enjoy each other
Some couples get along by teasing or arguing passionately; in these long relationships, underneath all the verbal arguments, there is mutual enjoyment. Lust is exciting, but if you really like the person you spend time with, it’s a sign that your relationship can progress. Pay attention to how you feel and let that guide you.
3. You feel close even if you’re not serious
In long-term relationships, couples feel comfort and instant harmony with each other from the very beginning. Even if you’re meeting for the first time, you’ll both feel the familiarity. Pay attention to whether there is a certain closeness between you and this person.
4. Look for action, not words
Small gestures and actions, rather than words, can shed light on you. If your partner makes an effort to be thoughtful, caring, and romantic, this may be a sign of a serious relationship. If you notice that the other person remembers your favorite dessert or drink, or you go to extra trouble to make sure they have a fun time (which you don’t have to), it may mean that there’s more involved than just a fling.
Look at how you both act towards each other and that may illuminate the path ahead.
5. You can see a future together
Even though you understand that things between you will end when the summer ends, you unintentionally dream of a future with this person. Your partner may be free and have talked about going to a future event together, such as going to a concert. If you talk (or think) in a forward-looking manner, whether it’s about the distant or near future, that’s definitely a sign that this is more than just a fling.
We recommend that you continue to communicate honestly and openly about what you want without coming off too strong. Even if you started with just a fling, if at some point you realize you really want more, find a way to talk to the other person. “You are my soul mate!” You don’t have to say that and risk scaring him away. But be honest with him about how much you enjoy spending time together and tell him that you want things to go beyond just a fling.
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