Digg it!I heard that HBO is doing a series adaptation of the Neil Gaiman’s Sandman. If that is true, then we are up for a treat on the depiction of Lucifer.
While we salivate over that, let us take a look at the different portrayals of the devil and how each movie provided us a unique glimpse on how evil lurks among us through their own words.
10. Elizabeth Hurley in Bedazzled tied with David Warner in Time Bandits
This is the only film I know where the Devil is portrayed by a seductive woman. The movie is a comedy but there is a lot of truth to their depiction of evil, it is supposed to be like that, sexy and seductive. It doesn’t come in our lives dressed in hideous costumes and stinking like a freshly baked shit. It comes beautiful and gorgeous. It will make you want to do everything it asks you to do, with pleasure.
The Devil: Paragraph one states that I, the Devil, a not-for-profit cooperation, with offices in Purgatory, Hell, and Los Angeles, will give you seven wishes to use as you see fit.
Elliot Richards: Oh, yeah. You’ve been a really big help so far.
The Devil: I know. I’ve been really naughty, haven’t I? Maybe a good spanking’s in order?
Elliot Richards: Is that all you ever think about? Do you think everything is about sex?
The Devil: No, of course not! I mean, there’s greed, gluttony, sloth, anger, vanity, envy…
It was the idea of the devil trying to dominate technology because it cannot create the beauty that God created – the sky, the earth, the universe. Much like men, eh? We can’t create nature so we create machines.
Evil: God isn’t interested in technology. He cares nothing for the microchip or the silicon revolution. Look how he spends his time, forty-three species of parrots! Nipples for men!
Robert: Slugs.
Evil: Slugs! HE created slugs! They can’t hear. They can’t speak. They can’t operate machinery. Are we not in the hands of a lunatic?
Evil: When I have the map, I will be free, and the world will be different, because I have understanding.
Robert: Uh, understanding of what, Master?
Evil: Digital watches. And soon I shall have understanding of video cassette recorders and car telephones. And when I have understanding of them, I shall have understanding of computers. And when I have understanding of computers, I shall be the Supreme Being!
9. Viggo Mortensen The Prophecy
Lucifer: I can lay you out and fill your mouth with your mother’s feces, or we can talk.
Lucifer: God? God is love. I don’t love you.
Gabriel: This war is mine!
Lucifer: Your war is arrogance. That makes it evil. That’s mine.
Lucifer: I was the first angel, loved once above all others… But like all true love… one day it withered on the vine…
Lucifer: Humans… and how I love you talking monkeys for this… know more about war and treachery of the spirit than any angel.
Lucifer: [shrill whisper] I love you! I love you more than Jesus!
8. Trey Parker of South Park
There is someone more abusive and evil than Satan, Saddam Hussein. One of those rare moments that cracked me up.
Satan: How come you always want to make love to me from behind? Is it because you want to pretend I’m somebody else?
Saddam Hussein: Satan, your ass is gigantic and red. Who am I going to pretend you are, Liza Minelli?
Satan: Saddam, I need to talk to you
Saddam Hussein: Ah, you’d better get packing, bitch, we’re running out of time.
Satan: [sighs] sometimes you can love someone very much, but still know they aren’t right for you.
Saddam Hussein: What the *fuck* are you talking about?
Satan: You treat me like shit, Saddam! I’m leaving you!
Saddam Hussein: What? No? No! You can’t do that! I have to go to Earth!
Satan: You don’t even have any respect for me.
Saddam Hussein: Sure I do, guy, please, just hear me out
7. Dave Grohl in The Pick of Destiny
Satan: I AM COMPLETE!
KG, JB: FUUUUCKK!
Satan: [singing] Yes you are fucked/Shit out of luck./Now I’m complete and my cock you will suck. This world shall be mine/ and you’re first in line/You brought me the pick and now you shall both die!
JB: [singing] WAIT, Wait, wait, you motherfucker! We chalenge you to a rock-off! Give us one chance to rock your socks off!
Satan: FUCK! FUCK! Fuck! The demon code prevents me, from declining the rock off challenge. What are your terms? Whats the catch?
JB: [singing] If we win you must take your sorry ass back to hell, and also you will have to pay our rent!
Satan: And what if i win?
JB: Then you can take Kage back to hell…
KG: What?
JB: Trust me, Kage. It’s the only way!
KG: What are you talking about?
JB: To be your little bitch!
Satan: Fine! Let the rock off begin!
6. Robert DeNiro in Angel Heart
DeNiro plays Louis Cyphre – an obvious pun on the name Lucifer – in Angel Heart, and stars opposite Mickey Rourke (Harry Angel).
Louis Cyphre: The flesh is weak, Johnny. Only the soul is immortal. And yours belongs to ME.
Louis Cyphre: They say there’s enough religion in the world to make men hate each other, but not enough to make them love.
If you liked this list you should also check out:
- Top 10 Devils in Films
- Top 10 Celebrities Who Are Also Hardcore Painters
- Top 10 Slasher Movies of All-Time
- Top 10 Most Boring Movies of All Time
- Top 10 Most Profitable Movies Of All Time
